Wednesday, October 24, 2012
That's what I did when I saw this today. Crazy, not pregnant and not going to be for at least six months, ol' me today, decided to do some playing with a Due Date calculator. And that's with high hopes of getting pregnant right off of BC. I guess it just put it into perspective...and it definately didn't help my pessimistic pregnancy mood. I hope to be out of it one day. And on that day I'll have a baby in my belly/arms...however it gets there. But as of late, it's much of the same. I just feel like I won't ever be pregnant. SS topped it today too, saying he's not giving up on a baby of our own, but he's mentally preparing for the reality of adoption. I'm not ready for that now. It's like a bad word to me...instant tears! Not that I wouldn't or don't want to or haven't thought about it. There are adoption websites saved right along with infertility...I think they pretty much go hand in hand. But I want my OWN baby. Part SS, part me..Our baby.
"Maybe we'll be lucky like your friend. Get twins, then get twins. Four babies!" SS was referring to the story I told him of my teacher adopting after TTC (which I now have a WAY better understanding of). They adopted twins, and shortly after (a few months) found out they were pregnant themselves, leading into the discovery of a twin pregnancy. Four babies in less than two years! She was an amazing woman...exactly what this 1st grader needed. And I didn't even know it then.